Parents have a lot of responsibilities. Or, as the saying goes, they “wear many hats.”
The idiom, originating from the 19th and early 20th centuries, pertains to jobs requiring specific headwear. (Think chefs, ranchers, or military personnel.) Sometimes, people have more than one job, and not everyone wears an actual hat at work. Nonetheless, the imagery is relatable and remains intact.
Figuratively speaking, people who engage in various roles or tasks often “change their hats.” How, exactly, does this apply to parenting? Here are some exemplified insights—off the top of my head. (Pun intended.)
TEN PARENTING HATS
GUIDE HAT– Each day represents a journey of sorts. Children rely on their parents’ advice, seeking it out, and then building upon it. Parents are guiding lights and leaders, and especially so when kids have trouble navigating the oft-rocky terrain of child development.
LISTENER HAT – Parents who know how to listen—carefully, and with an open heart and mind—will find there’s much to gain. Listening conveys respect for others, reflects a desire to learn and to connect, and fortifies family relationships.
CHEERLEADER HAT – A little praise, a compliment, or a reassuring fist pump can be motivating and reassuring. Be encouraging and available to give kids a boost when needed. Supporting children’s efforts and progress may also involve speaking up and advocating on their behalf. (Help them learn to advocate and cheerlead for themselves, as well.)
TEACHER HAT – Learning commences the moment a child is born, and parents have an important responsibility to teach all kinds of lessons. For example, values, safety measures, language skills, problem-solving strategies, manners, and SO much more. The teacher hat is not relinquished when children go to school.
ORGANIZER HAT – Day-to-day family life requires considerable organization. This includes preparing and scheduling meals, arranging comings and goings, and coordinating extra-curricular activities. There are also purchases of all sorts to make (clothing, groceries, incidentals), household chores to share, and technology-related matters to consider. Although each family has its own organizational set-up and routines, parents are generally at the helm.
DREAMER HAT – Parents inevitably have aspirations for their children. This may have to do with health, happiness, academics, relationships—or other hopes and dreams. (The dreamer hat often lies beneath the other ones noted above!)
HEALER HAT – Parents apply bandages, remove slivers, kiss bruises, consult with medical and pharmaceutical professionals, dispense remedies, and offer consolation and aid. They provide safe havens and comfort zones, and can assist when children experience emotional or social issues, too. (The healer hat may have to be donned at a moment’s notice!)
COLLABORATOR HAT – Parents connect with many people over the course of a child’s growing-up years. For instance, teachers, extended family members, other parents, coaches, doctors, neighbors, crossing guards, librarians—the list goes on. Consider how many connections you have, and the impact. It may astound you.
ADJUDICATOR HAT – Family disagreements, unanticipated occurrences, tough decisions… These are just a few examples of times when parents may have to help smooth the way or demonstrate skills of negotiation and fair judgment.
STEP-ASIDER HAT – This may be the most difficult hat to keep on. It’s the one parents wear when enabling their children to figure things out by themselves. How? By stepping aside and encouraging their independence. That is, letting kids find their own answers, problem-solve, make mistakes and learn from them, and develop autonomy and resilience over time.
LAST WORDS: PROUD PARENTING
The “changing hats” descriptor is an apt way of acknowledging the slew of responsibilities that parents take on—and embrace—every day. There are certainly more than ten hats in the mix, and chances are you (and your kids) can think of others, or ones that are specific to your family!
Regardless of how many responsibilities there may be, hold your head high, and wear your hats proudly!
AUTHOR’S NOTE:
In my new children’s picture book, Grumblesome (vividly illustrated by Brandon Dorman), a young boy named Nat is upset after a quarrel with his parents. They remain calm, giving him time and space to tap his own resolve, strength, and creativity, and ultimately, he finds a way forward. (The step-asider hat!)
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Dr. Joanne Foster is a multiple award-winning author of several books. Her newest publication, GRUMBLESOME is a children’s rhyming picture book with brilliant artwork by Brandon Dorman. GRUMBLESOME has received a coveted Kirkus Starred Review! The book is for children 3 to 7 and their families. It’s published by Gifted Unlimited, with release slated for Sept. 15th, 2026. (Pre-orders are available now across retail outlets.) For information and resources on learning, creativity, motivation, well-being, and more—and to subscribe to Joanne’s newsletter—go to www.joannefoster.ca
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Cover image by RDNE Stock project